Thursday, January 31, 2008

The Perfect Metaphor for "Congressional Oversight"

Really; what more needs, or even CAN be added?
Photo Credit: personal archives, but I'm sure it came from some other conservative-bent blog

Wednesday, January 30, 2008


1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon "unclean."

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can't think of anyone you HAVEN'T declared Jihad against.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You've ever uttered the phrase, "I love what you've done with your cave."

10. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.

11. You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.

12. You've ever had a crush on your neighbor's goat.

Hat Tip: Boortz

Monday, January 28, 2008

US Military Begins Ramp-Down For Dem President

Taking all projection polls to heart, the Joint Chiefs have issued individual guidance memorandum to their respective services. In a nutshell, they say "Looks like a Dem candidate will win in November, and regardless of which one it is, we're screwed. Prepare for 4 years of no funding."
Photo Credit: email from me son, active duty USAF

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Hillary Campaign Opens New Ad Series

Shrillary Clinton's staff released a new ad campaign today sure to wow the NOW crowd. Talk about your "Truth in Advertising" adherence! Unnamed sources over at the Silky Pony shop claim that they saw it first and that John-boy's rather miffed that the Shrill beat him to yet another first.
Photo Credit: Public Humiliator

From The "I Told You So" Department

Overheard by the paramedic's as they carted him to Mercy General: "I told you not to smoke in there after eating chili cheese dogs and drinking beer. But did you listen? NOOOOOOOOOO! Serves you right!"
Photo Credit: the usual source

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Hubris - New Photo Definition

hu·bris [hyoo-bris, hoo-] – noun

"excessive pride or self-confidence; arrogance."
Definition Credit:
Photo Credit: NYMag

Monday, January 21, 2008

War on Global Warming Weapon Issue

The wacko's over at the Church of Global Warming have finally found a weapon they can issue with confidence to the foot soldiers of the cause. Each one is manufactured is a carbon-offset friendly factory (each having paid the required fee to alGore hisself for excessive energy use and for the right to use as much petroleum-based plastics as they want). Be warned, gentle reader; while these ass-alt rifles look harmless enough, they are known to fire pellets of compressed Goreacle-isms and those babies are toxic in the extreme to anyone with an ounce of self-motivation and/or entreprenurial spirit.
Photo credit: RHOG blog

Friday, January 18, 2008

No Obstruction Noted

"Well, he certainly doesn't appear to be choking, Mr. Submariner..."
Photo Credit: email from my buddy Candeece

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

I'm EXPERIENCED - "and You KNOW What I'm Talking About!"

Dateline: Washington DC
New Quarterback for the Packers Announced
In a news conference today, Deanna Favre announced she will be the new starting QB for the Packers this coming Sunday for their playoff game with the Giants. Deanna asserts that she is fully qualified to be starting QB because she has spent the past 16 years married to Brett while he played QB for the Packers. During this period of time she became familiar through breakfast, lunch and dinner conversation with the definition of a corner blitz, defense reads, and proper avoidance of media attacks, and is now completely comfortable with other terminology of the Packers offense. A survey of Packers fans shows that 50% of those polled supported the move with an abnormally high polling among female fans.

Does this sounds idiotic and unbelievable to you? Well, Hillary Clinton makes the same claims as to why she is qualified to be President and 50% of democrats polled agreed, again with an abnormally high polling among the female democrats.
Hillary's credentials? She has NEVER:
1 - Run a City
2 - Run a State
3 - Run a County
However, she HAS:
1 - Moved her family residence to a traditionally democratic state where her handlers were convinced she could win a Senate seat
2 - Been campaigning for U.S. President ever since
3 - Learned to cry on cue
When told Hillary Clinton has 'experience' because she has 8 years in the white house, Dick Morris stated "so has the pastry chef."

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Iran Announces First Successful Nuke Test

President Machmoody I'madumbjihaddi informed a pandering BBC correspondent that the "glorious caliphate has detonated a nuclear device capable of obliterating the entire homeland of the jooooooooooos. Of course, our innocent exploration of nuclear power is solely for peaceful research and energy >koff< >koff<
Any nation desiring to trade worthless plutonium for a lifetime supply of highly valuable oil can contact Machmoody hisself at nukisrael(a)jihad.iran
Photo Credit: Murder of Ravens

Hillary's Political Career - Word

Just a personal-preference metaphor for what I think is happening with the Hilldawg's career. Unfortunately, from what happened in New Hampshire, the emotional group seems to have been swayed by the tears she managed to manufacture. If that applies to any of the readers, just ask yourself who she was crying for - the country because we weren't smart enough to be playing our part in her scheduled coronation, or herself because the nation wasn't playing according to her rules and buying in to her scheduled coronation? Either way, it's all about the Hilldawg, not about what's good for this country.
Photo Credit: US Navy Virginia Class Submarine home page

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Hilldawg Attempts A "Likeability" Crusade

Stunned in Iowa and faced with another large loss in New Hampshire today, the "experienced" campaigner Hillary Rodham Clinton has finally come to the realization that she is perceived as a cold, scheming, political carpet-bagger clinging to the coattails and organization of a former President. While not setting well, she is a realist when it is to her advantage and she is attempting to show the "friendly, approachable and likeable side" of herself to voters. Unfortunately, she doesn't have one.
Photo Credit: Uncertain, probably a "best of the year" site

Monday, January 7, 2008

Citizen Mitt - A Candidate For All Americans

All of the beltway is abuzz over the new Orsen Welles directed Mitt Romney spot released today. The advertisement begins innocently as a news reel detailing Romney's life for the masses. From there we are shown rapid flashbacks from Romney's political life, ending with him standing on the steps at the Lincoln monument giving a stump speech, calling out the word "philatelist," and dropping a snow globe that is tracked as it artfully bounces down the steps and rolls towards the reflecting pool.
Photo Credit: Shorpy

Friday, January 4, 2008

Kennedy Clan Washes Up On Cape Cod

Environmentalists were apalled on the strand at Cape Cod Friday morning upon waking to the sight of the entire Kennedy Clan having washed ashore overnight. Cindy Shehag, spokesperson for the tree-hugging leftists reported that the ultimate cause of this abhorrent event had not yet been firmly determined, but it had been limited to two possibilities:
1 - A BusHitler/Haliburton covert operation
2 - Global warming
alGore has been summoned for consultation. Although his personal Jetstream V has been rerouted to Boston due to runway inadequacies at Cape Cod and a strech limo has been dispatched.
Photo Credit: FunPic

Thursday, January 3, 2008

No Shame AND No Scruples

"Mr. Right" reminded me of the similarity of behavior between the Silky Pony today and the Silky Pony of 4 years ago. For an illuminating excoriation of this poor excuse of a candidate, please follow the link to Charles Krauthammer's analysis of the 2004 event and then look again at this photo. Edwards appears to be the lowest, common denominator of the Dems. He doesn't have to try all that hard since it seems to come so naturally for him.
Photo Credit: SondraK

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Hillary Notes Slippage In The Polls

Dateline: Somewhere On The Road In Iowa
Following an intern's delivery of the latest overnight polls in this corn-fed, first primary state, the Hilldawg went into melt-down mode.
Photo Credit: Drudge Report

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Happy New Year!

Well, er.... ahem!
I guess we know how W. and Laura rang in 2008... Hope y'all did too. Here's hoping each of you has a great 2008 - the best of your lifes - and praying that it doesn't put a Shrillary in the Oval Office.
Photo Credit: Drudge Report